Sunday, July 26, 2009

For Sanity's Sake

It occurred to me that I need to journal again for my sanity's sake. I found the journal that I left off on and I just couldn't get myself to start writing in it because too much time has passed. My whole self feels different than the person that wrote the last sentence months ago.

As I look for my other journal insert to place in my nice, leather....thing...I slowly realize that it is NOT where I thought that I put it, in order not to lose it. I cannot find it and it is making me nuts! I do not want to order another insert off of the internet. I want it now! Besides I shouldn't have to. I just know that I put it somewhere that I wouldn't lose it. I just know it!!!!! It is NOT LOST.

Finally, accepting that it is gone, I have been on the search for a new one. No, not a nice leather one like the one I got last time (no $$$). Oh and I do love it! It is red. Anyways, I just wanted the "right" one. One that expressed me and was worthy of my thoughts. Yes, I am vain. It must look chic w/o trying too hard, not too thick, not too thin, hmmmm lined or not...depends on my mood, not too tall/wide, and it must close nicely. Oh and I can't forget the price. Sounds easy to find, huh? Well, its not for me. I don't know why I make such a deal out of the committment I make to a journal when I purchase it, but I do. Shoot me.

Anyways, after wandering a handful of stores and still unable to pull the trigger it occurred to me that maybe it would make more sense to blog. Uh. Yeah Right! So, that everyone could read this? That is not the kind of person I am. Who would read this? Would I be true to a blog? Hmmm... Well, I guess I will find out. To make it easier on MYSELF I have decided not to tell anyone that I have this blog. If people find be it. That way, if I tell myself that no one is reading it then I might feel more comfortable writing. Gotta say that I do admire those that lay it all out there and makes it known that its out there. I have learned and have been encouraged by them. Maybe I could tell people someday......just not today....for my sanity's sake!

(And don't even get me started with this layout thing. I hate it. I want a nice personal one, but I don't do this whole techy thing. We all gotta start somewhere I guess.)

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